Life Without Lawrence

Life without Lawrence - Today marks 3 months. In some ways it seems like an eternity and then again it seems like it was only a moment ago that I heard his last breath. This morning I was thinking about the day that Lawrence was put on ECMO. There is no way to describe seeing your husband being wheeled out of the room to be put on life support knowing without a miracle he would not live very long. Yet in typical Lawrence Miller fashion he wasn't scared or nervous or worried. When the surgical team came to get him I asked them to wait while I prayed. They were so patient and even prayed with me. Then as they rolled my sweet, always fun loving husband out the door he lifted his arm, pointed his finger and said..."To infinity and beyond." It was a priceless moment. The surgical team chimed in with him and then everyone burst into to laughter! Lawrence loved to make people laugh. In his worst moments he never missed an opportunity to bring a smile or laugh to someone's life. I miss that silly man so much, sometimes more than I think I can bear. But then I remember. I remember his laugh, I remember how much he loved people, I remember how much fun he made life and I know that's what life is all about. Loving people, loving life and making someone's day a little better. Three months ago my beloved Lawrence took that last trip...to infinity and beyond. Oh how high he must be soaring today!